Tough 4 Me
Yesterday was a very sensitive day for me, suddenly I remember my late Grandfather. I’m wondering why he never came to my dream instead of my Mom. Maybe cause my Mom is his first daughter but I’m his first grand daughter too you know. Actually I want to confess something, these couple of years I’m having hard times in forgiving myself cause I didn’t fullfill his last wish. He was just want to see me and I can manage my schedule just to see him in the hospital.
He never show the love and care for me. Well I don’t know, it’s just me being selfish I guess. I forgive him for not showing his love, but can I forgive myself for not being there for him at the last minute. People say that we will able to forgive others only if we can forgive ourselves first, is it true?
Why is that everybody expect so much from me, I’m a human too with feeling with heart. I’m not perfect you know I can’t do all things perfect as everybody wants. I can be selfish too, not thinking about other’s feeling and put mine first. Well is anyone out there could tell me what to do, what has to be done? I don’t want to continue make other people happy while I’m hurting myself inside. It’s not fair, I deserve to be happy too. What did I do wrong that make me treated so bad?
